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T O P I C    R E V I E W
Rick Posted - 10/01/2012 : 10:29:01 AM
I'm starting this new thread as a place to post jokes, videos, pictures and just about any other off topic thing you want to put here.
Two reasons for doing this.
One, it helps cut down on the number of threads in the Lounge.
Second, it makes finding videos, pictures or jokes that were posted in the past easier to find.
I've tried finding things that were posted and wanted to see again but sometimes I just couldn't find it.

I hope everyone enjoys this thread and even contributes to it from time to time.
15   L A T E S T    R E P L I E S    (Newest First)
MarcusF Posted - 03/15/2018 : 10:54:11 PM
I told my wife I thought she'd pencilled her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
Rick Posted - 03/15/2018 : 5:15:37 PM
The devil walks into a Catholic Church. Everyone runs out screaming except for one very weathered man. The devil confronts him and asks, “Why are you not afraid of me?” The weathered man replies, “I married your sister”....
Ray Dunakin Posted - 02/23/2018 : 12:55:55 AM
"Her pigeon toes keep a' peckin' her corns..." -- Homer and Jethro
Rick Posted - 02/20/2018 : 04:55:23 AM
“My wife can’t cook at all. I got the only dog that begs for Alka-Seltzer.” - Rodney Dangerfield
Jack M Posted - 02/16/2018 : 02:06:54 AM
There is or was a couple of DJ's at a Tulsa, OK radio station who call people with prank telephone calls which are requested by the target's friends or coworkers. They made a few CD's and here is one of the segments from one of their CD's. The DJ's use a name of Roy D. Murcer as the individual who calls the target and threatens him with factitious events.


Jack M.
nortonw Posted - 02/16/2018 : 12:16:45 AM
Jaynjay (John),

After you posted your previous link to those DJ's from SoCal, I went and found another of their hilarious clips. This is one of my favorites.


I listened to one of their CD's while I was working today.
nortonw Posted - 02/09/2018 : 12:20:37 AM
Love these guys John. My favorite happens to be the Obscene Phone Bust. Or Montague for Governor. But I'll listen to most any of their stuff.

Thanks for sharing.

P.S. I found that Obscene Phone Call clip on YouTube as well.
jaynjay Posted - 02/08/2018 : 11:11:00 AM
The guys were DJ's in the LA area, they made a few comedy records and this was the most propular

Rick Posted - 02/08/2018 : 06:34:20 AM
WC Fields playing pool https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQYNvEPi9-s
ed k Posted - 12/31/2017 : 11:53:31 AM
Mostly true stories. Good way to end 2017, which has been quite the bad joke.
mwbpequod Posted - 12/31/2017 : 10:54:33 AM
I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me. It was her beautiful younger sister.

My prospective sister-in-law was twenty two, wore very tight miniskirts and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me and I always got a more than nice view. It had to be deliberate, because she never did it when she was near anyone else.

One day her 'little' sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.

Well, I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me."

I was stunned and frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to the front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car.

Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping! With tears in his eyes, my future father-in-law hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."

And the moral of this story is:

Always keep your condoms in your car.
Norton Posted - 06/05/2017 : 12:38:58 PM
A man and a woman were having dinner in a fine restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away noticed that the man was slowly sliding down his chair and under the table, with the woman acting unconcerned. The waitress watched as the man slid all the way down his chair and out of sight under the table. Still, the woman dining across from him appeared calm and unruffled, apparently unaware that her dining companion had disappeared. After the waitress finished taking the order, she came over to the table and said to the woman, "Pardon me, ma'am, but I think your husband just slid under the table."

The woman calmly looked up at her and replied firmly, "No, he didn't. He just walked in the door."
Norton Posted - 06/05/2017 : 12:38:04 PM
An Indian Chief was asked by a U.S. government official: “You have observed the white man for 90 years. You’ve seen his wars and his technological advances. You’ve seen his progress and the damage he’s done.”

The Chief nodded in agreement.

The official continued, “Considering all these events, in your opinion where did the white man go wrong?”

The Chief stared at the government official and then replied, “When they came here, there was no tax, no debt, plenty of food, clean water. Women did all the work, medicine was free. We spent all day hunting and fishing; all night having sex.”

Then the Chief leaned back and smiled, “Only the white man was dumb enough to think he could improve a system like that.”
MarkF Posted - 05/30/2017 : 11:41:34 PM
Two guys Frank & Harry grow up together but after college one moves to Los Angeles and the other to New York. They agree to meet every ten years in Atlantic City and play golf.

At age 30, they finish their round of golf and go to lunch.

"Where you wanna go?"



"Well, you know, they got the broads, with the big racks, and the tight shorts, and the legs ..."


Ten years later at age 40 they play.

"Where you wanna go?"



"Well, you know, they got cold beer and the big screen TVs and everybody has a little action on the games."


Ten years later at age 50 they play

"Where you wanna go?"



"The food is pretty good and there is plenty of parking."


At age 60 they play

"Where you wanna go?"



"Wings are half price."


At age 70 they play

"Where you wanna go?"



"They have 6 handicapped spaces right by the door."


At age 80 they play

"Where you wanna go?"



"We've never been there before."

I guess we're all getting there....
Norton Posted - 04/13/2017 : 1:25:15 PM
An Arizona Highway Patrol officer stops a Harley for traveling faster than the posted speed limit, so he asks the biker his name. ‘Fred’ he replies.

‘Fred what?” the officer asks,

‘Just Fred’ the man responds.
The officer, in a good mood, thinks he might just give the biker a break, and write him out a warning instead of a ticket. The officer then presses him for a last name.

The man tells him that he used to have a last name but he lost it.

The officer thinks he has a nut case on his hands but plays along with it. ‘Tell me, Fred, how did you lose your last name?’

The biker replies, ’It’s a long story so stay with me. I was born Fred Johnson. I studied hard and got good grades. When I got older, I realized I wanted to be a doctor. I went through college, medical school, internship, residency, and finally got my degree, so I was Fred Johnson, MD. After a while I got bored being a doctor, so I decided to go back to school. Dentistry was my dream! Got all the way through school, got my degree, so then I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS. Got bored doing dentistry, so I started fooling around with my assistant and she gave me VD. So now I was Fred Johnson, MD, DDS with VD. Well the ADA found out about the VD, so they took away my DDS. Then I was Fred Johnson, MD, with VD. Then the AMA found out about the ADA taking away my DDS because of the VD, so they took away my MD leaving me Fred Johnson with VD. Then the VD took away my Johnson, so now I am just Fred.’

The officer walked away in tears, laughing.

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