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  • Oxymorons

    Hi All,

    I know that at least some of these have been posted before but some of them are new to me (love #27! ) And it's quiet on the forum so I thought I'ld post them just in case someone would like something to read!!

    1.Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

    2. Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

    3. If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

    4. If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

    5. Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

    6. Why does "slow down" and "slow up" mean the same thing?

    7. Why does "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

    8. Why do "tug" boats push their barges?

    9. Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already there?

    10. Why are they called " stands" when they are made for sitting?

    11. Why is it called "after dark" when it really is "after light"?

    12. Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?

    13. Why are a "wise man" and a "wise guy" opposites?

    14. Why do "overlook" and "oversee" mean opposite things?

    15. Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

    16. If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

    17. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting?

    18. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

    19. If you are cross-eyed and have dyslexia, can you read all right?

    20. Why is bra singular and panties plural?

    21. Why do you press harder on the buttons of a remote control when you know the batteries are dead?

    22. Why do we put suits in garment bags and garments in a suitcase?

    23. How come abbreviated is such a long word?

    24. Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?

    25. Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

    26. Why do they call it a TV set when you only have one?

    27. Christmas - What other time of the year do you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks?

    28. Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?

    Look out for #1, but don\'t step in #2!



    Andy Keeney

    Dewitt, MI

  • #2
    Andy

    Why does this all make so much sense?

    Thanks for posting

    Peter

    Comment


    • #3
      So true...Thanks for the smiles.

      Richard

      Comment


      • #4
        They make sense to me. Goods one Andy.
        Scott, from the wilds of Carroll County, Ohio

        Comment


        • #5
          If nothing sticks to teflon, how do they get teflon to stick to the pan?

          P
          https://www.flickr.com/photos/eightnotch/

          Comment


          • #6
            Hey, Dude,

            Good stuff! :up: But having recently spent four weeks on jury duty on a case that should have taken two days to resolve, I've come to the conclusion that the greatest oxymoron of all time is the phrase "legal brief." :erm:

            Comment


            • #7
              Why do we 'take a leak' (etc...) rather than 'put' one?

              dave
              Modeling 1890s (because the voices in my head told me to)

              Comment


              • #8
                No problem posting again, Andy. Always great to read them one more time, Andy. Now, I must get back to my dinner of "Jumbo Shrimp"!
                Mike Hamer

                Ottawa, Ontario, Canada

                http://www.bostonandmaine.blogspot.ca

                http://www.craftsmanstructures.blogspot.ca

                http://modelrailroadsivisit.blogspot.ca

                Comment

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